I don’t want to write about Josh Duggar

IMG_0044I’ve never been a fan of reality TV. I don’t watch the Kardashians, or the Bachelor, or Duck Dynasty.  I did watch Honey Boo Boo a few times, but it was like watching a bad car wreck and not being able to take my eyes off of it and wanting to close my eyes all at the same time. My life has enough drama on its own, and I just don’t need to watch other people’s drama in my free time.

Then this happened. http://www.cnn.com/2015/05/21/us/josh-duggar-child-molestation-allegations/ And I wanted to throw up. As a counselor, I’ve seen the effect that sexual abuse has on victims. It’s real and it’s traumatic and it follows the victim for life. Victims can learn tools to help themselves cope and all that, but let’s be real. NO ONE should have to experience any kind of abuse, and sexual abuse is particularly awful. There are not winners in any of this.  But there are some losers.

I’ve read a bunch of stuff online since the Josh Duggar thing happened. Haters on all sides have chimed in. The thought I keep returning to is this: Once again, Christians don’t look any different than the rest of the world. It’s not like I don’t know this, but every time a public Christian figure does something embarrassing, we all take the hit. Those of us who follow Jesus have to listen to those who don’t say things like,”Christians aren’t any different. They talk all high and mighty about sin and are so judgmental of everyone, and then they do the same things.” The truth is, they’re right and that makes me sad. It kills me when public people make public mistakes and the world watches and laughs. I want to get all defensive and tell them that we’re not all like this.

But then I remember that in many ways we are all like this. It may not look like sexual abuse, but it doesn’t look like Jesus. We do make many mistakes and there are a lot of days that my following Jesus doesn’t look any different than the day of someone who doesn’t. That makes me sad too. And grateful for God’s grace.

John 16:33 in the Amplified Bible says this: “I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have [perfect] peace and confidence. In the world you have tribulation and trials and distress and frustration; but be of good cheer [take courage; be confident, certain, undaunted]! For I have overcome the world. [I have deprived it of power to harm you and have conquered it for you.]

Lord help us to look different because we follow you.


  1. Kathy Woods on May 30, 2015 at 6:17 pm

    Great job Melody!!! I love this!!!!

    • melodyreid on May 30, 2015 at 6:24 pm

      Thanks Kathy!

  2. Christy on May 30, 2015 at 7:55 pm

    Thank you.

  3. Babs on May 31, 2015 at 3:02 am

    It isn’t “embarrassing.” It is child abuse. It is sexual molestation. It is incestuous sexual molestation. It is deliberate cover up, by greedy people, of their son’s criminal activities. I am a Christian, meaning I try to follow Christ’s teachings. I am not embarrassed, as a Christian, by people who profess Christianity, but who follow the teachings of a cult leader named Bill Gothard.

    Child abuse is everyone’s business. Don’t make excuses for the abusers and enablers.

    • melodyreid on May 31, 2015 at 2:05 pm

      Thanks for your comment. I completely agree with you about child abuse. I was trying to say that when things like this happen in the public eye it feels embarrassing to me that “the world” might think this is a true representation of following Jesus, and it isn’t. Thanks for weighing in and giving me an opportunity to clarify.

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